#openthoughts -- Identity: Don't get Lost in the Crowd

I work in the security industry and all throughout my time as a steward, I have been taught how to manage crowd behaviour. Within crowd behaviour, there are the three d's - Dynamic, Density and Distress. Within that, we were told to watch out for people who seem to be lost within the crowd or conforming to their surroundings and also those who seem to be in distress.

If you have attended a football match before, you will be aware of the masses of people that attend on any given day. If you are not careful, you could end up getting lost in the crowd. The question we should ask ourselves is why?

It's a question that I have often asked myself and pondered for a while now. One of the things is that we can sometimes conform to our surroundings and try our utmost fit in because it's the easiest way or if we see most people acting in a certain manner, we think it's perfect to act in that way.
We can also get lost in the crowd when there are emergencies or problems, within that you're not thinking rationally and your fight or flight mode kicks in. At that moment, nobody in the crowd is thinking, they just want to get out of the exit so they can be safe.

9 times out of 10, we are like that. Whenever we face problems, we too tend to take the easy way out. We follow everybody and when we see someone heading in a direction, we will head that way also not knowing where it will lead us.
When we do this, will eventually get lost to the point of no return.

When I read the bible, I am reminded that when King David came to Ziklag, he found that all his family had been taken. At that moment you would expect him to forget everything and go after them but that is not what he did. He sat down and inquired after God. He soon got his answer and he was able to recover all that he had lost.
If King David had followed the crowd and went after them without listening to God, it could have been costly.

So, we know why we can sometimes get lost in a crowd. The next question - how can we ensure that we don't get lost?

One major key is to listen. I have found that if I ask a policeman or someone official like a steward of a response team steward, I am assured that they will tell me the best route to exit the place. Because they know the layout, I am able to find my way out if I listen and obey instructions.

The next key is to be calm. Whenever there is a crowd problem at games, there is never anything calm about the whole situation but whenever one person in the crowd is calm, it will rub off on everybody else. When you know and listen to the people in charge, you will definitely be calm about the situation. It's not going to be easy when you are in fight or flight mode but take some time out and listen to what is being said.

Another major key is to read the signs. When all else fails, follow the signs. Exit This way, Fire Exit, Emergency Exit, all of these exits will eventually help you get back to your starting place and will help you keep moving but when you don't read signs, confusion kicks in. Signs are there to guide you, signs are there to help you. Don't dismiss the signs.

It is very possible to stand out from the crowd when you know who you are and where you are. Stand out from the crowd, don't get lost. God needs you to stand out

Be blessed

#Openthoughts - There is room for everyone

Each and every day, people will rush about trying to fit in or even push people out the way so they can have space. It's a sorry sight, it's also very dangerous as people can get hurt in the process.
Trying to rush about will only delay your journey. Relax, be still, be at peace because there is room for everyone.

If you picture a typical train journey in the morning, you will see a mass of people either walking to work, getting the bus or train, taking children to school or just going from A-B. 9 times out of 10, they will all be worried about how they will get there henceforth why many people try to push past people but will find that they will end up being late and missing out.

Life will bring many demands which we will have to meet but we can negotiate those demands by being calm. Not everyone will have that same mindset but you can dictate how you react by realizing that your time will come. There will be a time when the train will be empty, when you will get a seat on the bus and when the roads are less busier than usual.

Having the 'there is room for me' mindset will ensure that you don't conform to society and the ways of the world. Failure to have this mindset will only result in frustration and then lead to the point where you copy how others react and what others do.

The key to breaking this habit is to know your identity and be confident in yourself. Be confident in what you have to offer and the impact that it will bring. You also need to know that you are unique and that you have something different. Only then will others realize that there will room for everyone to operate.

It's very possible for two strikers to play together, it's very possible for two left footers to play in one team and it is very possible for two captains to be on the pitch at the same time. Be yourself, be good to others, don't rush around and you will be able to breathe properly.

When I was young, I always thought that to be accepted by society I had to be like certain people so I can reach the top. So, that meant me trying to become a footballer or wanting to make music. Oh, how wrong was I............ I failed spectacularly but when I walked down the path of being a writer and also security I soon found out that I could walk a different path and still get to the top. This was an important lesson and one that I will never forget.

There's something a wise man used to say to me and my friends when growing up which was "You will eat, there is enough food for everyone to eat, be patient"

You will get your food and you will have enough to share with people around you. Be calm, wait your turn. There is room for me and you, There is room for everyone.

#Openthoughts - The right time

Everybody loves to talk, in fact, they say that talking is good for the soul but what happens when you start talking too much? What happens if you say things at the wrong time?

It's a well-known fact that when people need to talk, at times it is done just so that they can respond. Are you the type of person to listen just so you can talk back?
Are you the type of person who waits for their turn and talks when they need to talk?

In life, we are required to respond to every situation but how you respond is crucial. Being silent is not an option, it may work for a while but at some stage, you will have to say something but when you say it has a significant cause to it. What you say can make or break you.

When someone declares something good about themselves, 9 times out of 10 it will come to pass but when someone says something bad or makes a decree, it will take place. No matter what stage of life you are at, you have to be careful with your words.
Your words can either kill someone or give someone life. People who work in key areas such as education, social care etc have a responsibility to be careful with their words. What they say to their students, service users can have a huge bearing on what happens to them.

Your words contain so much power, your words contain so much life, your words have meaning. People may not remember what you did but they will remember what you said. Many people will not admit that what you said either blessed or hurt them, but be assured but it did. Whenever a word has an impact on someone's life, they will always remember it.

I want to tell you that whilst you may think that what you say is not important, you have to release what you want to say. Not saying anything can cause you problems but also saying things at the wrong time can cause you problems.

 Words do more than convey information. The power of our words can actually destroy one’s spirit, even stir up hatred and violence. They not only exacerbate wounds but inflict them directly. Of all the creatures on this planet, only man has the ability to communicate through the spoken word.

There will be a right time to talk. Wait for your turn................

#Openthoughts - You can do it

Have you ever given yourself an excuse as to why you can't do something? Have you ever said to yourself it's too hard for me..........?
If you have then you are not alone. Many people give themselves a reason as to why something can't be done.

There's a scripture in the bible which is one that we abide to daily -

Philippians 4:13 -  I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

This lets me know that all things are possible so all those pre-conceived ideas as to why something can't be done is just a figment of my imagination. So, ask yourself again. Do you have any reason as to why something can't be done.

We have often found out that when we give ourself excuses we put limits on our ability so when you say things like "I can't", "It won't happen" or "I don't think I can" we are actually programming our mind to only work to a certain level and then stop.

If you can programme your mind by saying things such as "I can do it", "I am able to do it" then everything becomes a possibility. All the barriers you once thought were impossible to shift will no longer look impossible, all the things you thought that you couldn't do, you will now be able to do them. It's definitely worked for us in a number of ways.
When you declare you can and you will, you will find that you will actually begin to start doing those things i.e. Someone says I can swim 50 metres. Once they get to 50 metres, that fear has now gone and they will go further and further.

The thing that stops us is our ability to 'Do it'. You won't know you can do something until you actually do it, you won't know you can do something until you step out the comfort zone, you won't know you can do something until you enlarge your mindset and expand your thinking.

Your mouth can speak life and death to a situation. What you say can either have a positive or negative effect. Choose your words wisely

You also need to check your circle around you. Are they encouraging you to great and mighty things? Are they a constant source of encouragement? Are they providing support?
For you to achieve something, you need people who can see that you can do it and are willing to encourage you and support you.

As you read this I want you to declare this to yourself everyday

I Can
I will
I am able
Nothing is too hard for me
I am willing to try

Stay blessed

#openthoughts - Stay at the top

If you are like us, you would have noticed that the Olympics were on. During the Olympics, we saw many athletes win either Gold, Silver or Bronze.

There were two images that blew our minds. The race between De Grasse and Bolt. In that race, Bolt coasted down the field but De Grasse was focusing on Bolt as if to say, 'I want to be like you'. In this first image, i'd imagine that Bolt was saying 'I'm still number one, if you want to be the best, you have to beat the best'
Right now, Bolt is at the top of the world in the 100 metres and 200 metres, if people want to take that crown, they have to beat Bolt. It's as simple as that but as long as Bolt is at the top of his game, no one is reaching the top.

Now, let's look at it for ourselves. Some of us are fighting to get the top and there will come a time where you will reach the top. Question is - Are you able to stay at the top?
Once you're at the top, you will find that there will be people who will want to challenge you each and every day, people will be looking at everything that you do. In order for you to stay at the top, you are going to have to improve yourself. I remember Usain Bolt said that he was disappointed with his time in the 200 metres final because he could have gone faster.

If you are not improving yourself and updating yourself, you risk losing everything you worked so hard for. Those that watch football will know the kind of season Chelsea had last season, it was a case that they didn't update themselves, they didn't fight to stay at the top. As a result there is a new name at the top - Leicester City.

Stay Focused, keep improving yourself, fight to stay at the top. At all costs, Stay at the top

#openthoughts - Ready, Steady, Go

Earlier today, I was walking home when I saw a lady run across the middle of the road, no concern for the safety of herself and others. So as I approached the traffic lights, this thought came to mind, there are some things we have done without waiting and as a result of that, we enter problems. What if we could of just waited that little longer, listened to God more and were more patient?

There's no doubting that everyone needs to get somewhere but there are times we it is wise that we stop and wait for the signal to keep going. 

So, let's take this from two different perspectives. You're in a car travelling at a decent speed, everything is well but then you see a red light in the distance so you start to brake and stop until you are told to go. Now, there are some instances where your journey is delayed or you are told to divert to another path. Do you obey or do you go the way you always know? Not obeying could have some serious consequences, it might even prolong your journey. 

It may benefit you in the long run to go a different path. Remember, there are many routes to reach a destination, not everyone will go the way you are going.

 Let's take a train. Just like a car, it travels at some fast speeds. On occasions it is required to stop. Failure to stop could cause it to crash into another train which can have deadly consequences. It's better to stop than to pass and cause an accident which could have been avoided. 

Now, let's look at the person waiting at the traffic lights. We know that the 'red man' sign signals we should stop, and the 'green man' sign signals we can cross. Many of us might be at a red light where have to wait and many of us have the green light to go ahead and go on our journey. However, there are some people who don't like to wait, they will cross at any moment. Doing that could cost them their life as they risk getting hurt by the onrushing traffic. Think of that as the different problems in your life or the things that have not been designed for you, you are at a red light so you can let them pass without you becoming engulfed in a harmful situation. 

Where are you in your life right now? Do you feel some parts of your life is on hold right now? There probably is a reason for it, wait patiently. The time to go is on it's way. 

The next dimension to this is the following - When you have the green light, are you actually ready to go? Are you ready to move onto the next part of your journey? 

Think about it..........................................

Ready, Steady, Go........................................

#openthoughts - Change

Change is necessary, change is needed but what do you do when you lack the ability to change?

Let's look at what the word change means -

To give a completely different form or appearance to; transform
To undergo transformation or transition:

There are plenty more versions but we like these two specifically. Reason being is that when there is a change, you will notice it. It will be visible for all to see.
When we say that we are going to change, there should normally be a visible transformation but let's address why sometimes it may not happen.

One of the reasons is down to your mindset. Yes, everyone thinks you can just embark on a journey and expect your mind and body to adjust to it straight away. Unfortunately it doesn't work like that, you must first train your mind and let it adjust to the changes but sometimes you won't get a chance, you will have to adjust. How do you train your mind? You can speak to your mind, tell it good thoughts, repeat the changes that are set to come into effect and most importantly give yourself time.

There are instances where change takes place such as - Changing schools, moving houses, starting a new job, deciding to become more healthier.
In these instances it will be common that you won't like the change but once you become consistent and you become comfortable with it, the change won't actually affect you.
When you was at school and you moved into a new year, you were forced to change and adjust to the new year. Change is never meant to be easy but the process can be calm if we allow it to be.

Change doesn't change overnight, it takes place over a period of time. Don't get upset if you don't see a change straight away, keep doing what you are doing and you will soon start to see changes.
Once you have planted the seed or the idea, it takes a process or you can call it the watering stage or even the hibernation period. During that time, is when the change starts to take place and only when it's finished is when you will see a visible change.

Some destinies are short, some dreams are dismissed because of the inability to wait for change. To see change, you need patience, you need to give it time. Because you can't see a visible change, this doesn't mean that change is taking place.
Change will always start from within before it effects the outer appearance.

Do you have the ability to change? Are you prepared to allow the change to take place?

I pray you are blessed by this and may you see the change that you desire in your life